New Forum Rules - pengu's suggestion

[Pengu]

To all of you wondering about the recent increase in the amount of posts edited/threads closed. Since the mods had a few new recruits, it seems that all notion of intelligence has disappeared from the moderation of this forum.

Now, it's against the rules to ask questions, or talk about anything that could be in any way humanly possible linked to warez, mp3s, or anything illegal in any way. So. Tell ya what. Mods: Here are my tips for Moderating the macosx.com forums, in the new age of the internet, and all that cr@p.

<ol compact type="A" start="A">
<li>All discussion relating to porn is banned. Due to the fuzziness of what constitutes porn, use of the following words, or use of words which are formed by any of the following words, or images depicting, or links/reference to any site containing images/information regarding the following is banned:
<ol compact type="1" start="1">
<li>sex</li>
<li>love</li>
<li>body</li>
<li>kiss</li>
<li>touch</li>
<li>pants</li>
<li>shirt</li>
<li>shave</li>
<li>wax</li>
<li>trim</li>
<li>brazil</li>
<li>fruit</li>
<li>pro</li>
</ol>
Also, any links, images, quoted text, reference to or discussion of companies providing any of the above services or products, or offering products to allow users to create their own version of the aforementioned products or services is banned.
</li>
<li>All discussion relating to "warez", or illegal software is banned. This also includes discussion relating to:</li>
<ol compact type="1" start="1">
<li>Unofficial alpha or beta software.</li>
<li>20 year old software that is no longer supported by the company that went bust 2 weeks after releasing the software.</li>
<li>Windows in any way, because it was stolen from Apple.</li>
<li>Any "window" based GUI/OS (including Windows & MacOS) because Apple "stole" it from Xerox in the '70s.</li>
<li>Any software that can be used to download ANYTHING from the Internet, as it can also in theory be used to share warez (mp3's will be covered later).</li>
<li>Any software that can be used to write code for new programs because those programs might encroach on copyrights of existing software/companie(s).</li>
<li>Any type of physical media as this could theoretically be used to store/transfer/run any of the aforementioned software (both the illegal software itself, and the tools to create/acquire it).</li>
<li>Any company selling or making available any of the aforementioned products, or providing information on how to use any of the aforementioned products.</li>
</ol>
</li>
<li>All discussion relating to so-called "mp3 music", "DVD-rip" movies, or copyrighted images is banned. This also includes discussion relating to:</li>
<ol compact type="1" start="1">
<li>Any MP3 encoding/decoding/converting/playing software.</li>
<li>Any software that can be used to download ANYTHING from the Internet, as it can also in theory be used to share mp3's.</li>
<li>Any software that can be used to break DRM/Copy Protection, break DVD encryption, etc.</li>
<li>Any software that can be used to write code for new programs because those programs could be used to break DRM/Copy Protection, or share copyrighted material(s).</li>
<li>Any type of physical media as this could theoretically be used to store/transfer any of the aforementioned software (both the illegal software itself, and the tools to create/acquire it) or media.</li>
<li>Any company selling or making available any of the aforementioned products, or providing information on how to use any of the aforementioned products.</li>
</ol>
</li>
</ol>
A first breach of these new rules will result in the editing (deletion if the post cannot be edited to a suitable content and retain the original message) of the offensive post, and a letter written to the offenders mother.
Following a first breach, a users subsequent offending posts will be deleted, followed by deletion of the entire thread the offending post is part of, to pursuade other users to discourage users from posting inappropriate material (read: Monty Burns cuts TV & Beer to force the Springfield mob to get BoBo back from Maggie).

This is my reccomendation to the Site Owner, the Administrator, and the Moderators:
If the above seems outrageous, please remember that next time you edit a post or close a thread.

[toast]

You have posted your new rules in the Site Discussion section, but I do not see any discussion in your post. This looks rather like an opinion, an open letter.

[ksv]

I agree to all your suggestions. Let's go ban some people

Use your time on charity work instead

[Giaguara]

ksv did you tell them about the new mod count? 2 points for every modified post, 5 for every cancelled thread and 20 for every banned user. The winner gets it all ...

[Pengu]

OK. This is the THIRD time I've had to post this message. Ya see, a certain moderator seems to think that deleting it and asking me nicely not to post it again because "the admins make the forum rules" will make this all go away. WRONG. And now for your viewing pleasure:

To all of you wondering about the recent increase in the amount of posts edited/threads closed. Since the mods had a few new recruits, it seems that all notion of intelligence has disappeared from the moderation of this forum.

Now, it's against the rules to ask questions, or talk about anything that could be in any way humanly possible linked to warez, mp3s, or anything illegal in any way. So. Tell ya what. Mods: Here are my tips for Moderating the macosx.com forums, in the new age of the internet, and all that cr@p.

<ol compact type="A" start="A">
<li>All discussion relating to porn is banned. Due to the fuzziness of what constitutes porn, use of the following words, or use of words which are formed by any of the following words, or images depicting, or links/reference to any site containing images/information regarding the following is banned:
<ol compact type="1" start="1">
<li>sex</li>
<li>love</li>
<li>body</li>
<li>kiss</li>
<li>touch</li>
<li>pants</li>
<li>shirt</li>
<li>shave</li>
<li>wax</li>
<li>trim</li>
<li>brazil</li>
<li>fruit</li>
<li>pro</li>
</ol>
Also, any links, images, quoted text, reference to or discussion of companies providing any of the above services or products, or offering products to allow users to create their own version of the aforementioned products or services is banned.
</li>
<li>All discussion relating to "warez", or illegal software is banned. This also includes discussion relating to:</li>
<ol compact type="1" start="1">
<li>Unofficial alpha or beta software.</li>
<li>20 year old software that is no longer supported by the company that went bust 2 weeks after releasing the software.</li>
<li>Windows in any way, because it was stolen from Apple.</li>
<li>Any "window" based GUI/OS (including Windows & MacOS) because Apple "stole" it from Xerox in the '70s.</li>
<li>Any software that can be used to download ANYTHING from the Internet, as it can also in theory be used to share warez (mp3's will be covered later).</li>
<li>Any software that can be used to write code for new programs because those programs might encroach on copyrights of existing software/companie(s).</li>
<li>Any type of physical media as this could theoretically be used to store/transfer/run any of the aforementioned software (both the illegal software itself, and the tools to create/acquire it).</li>
<li>Any company selling or making available any of the aforementioned products, or providing information on how to use any of the aforementioned products.</li>
</ol>
</li>
<li>All discussion relating to so-called "mp3 music", "DVD-rip" movies, or copyrighted images is banned. This also includes discussion relating to:</li>
<ol compact type="1" start="1">
<li>Any MP3 encoding/decoding/converting/playing software.</li>
<li>Any software that can be used to download ANYTHING from the Internet, as it can also in theory be used to share mp3's.</li>
<li>Any software that can be used to break DRM/Copy Protection, break DVD encryption, etc.</li>
<li>Any software that can be used to write code for new programs because those programs could be used to break DRM/Copy Protection, or share copyrighted material(s).</li>
<li>Any type of physical media as this could theoretically be used to store/transfer any of the aforementioned software (both the illegal software itself, and the tools to create/acquire it) or media.</li>
<li>Any company selling or making available any of the aforementioned products, or providing information on how to use any of the aforementioned products.</li>
</ol>
</li>
</ol>
A first breach of these new rules will result in the editing (deletion if the post cannot be edited to a suitable content and retain the original message) of the offensive post, and a letter written to the offenders mother.
Following a first breach, a users subsequent offending posts will be deleted, followed by deletion of the entire thread the offending post is part of, to pursuade other users to discourage users from posting inappropriate material (read: Monty Burns cuts TV & Beer to force the Springfield mob to get BoBo back from Maggie).

This is my reccomendation to the Site Owner, the Administrator, and the Moderators:
If the above seems outrageous, please remember that next time you edit a post or close a thread.

[Arden]

LOL, at first I thought you were being serious...

Mods, site staff, etc., I think you should leave this thread up. This is one helluva funny joke.

[Pengu]

arden. I am serious. The serious message is at the bottom of the new rules.

This is my reccomendation to the Site Owner, the Administrator, and the Moderators:
If the above seems outrageous, please remember that next time you edit a post or close a thread.

THAT is the real message I'm trying to get across. Too many people read the funny part and ignore the rest. I have no problem with the mods editing out swearing, or direct links to porn/warez/etc. But when you close a thread because it talks about software that COULD be used for warez/etc sharing, where a user asks a genuine question about the use of bandwidth, then I think the admins need a virtual kick in the ass let them see what it is exactly they're doing.

As for changing the name, because it was really NECESSARY to tell people it was MY suggestion. OOH LOOK. Someone called Penu wrote some new rules for the site. They seem to be taking the piss out of the admins. I wonder if they're real, or possibly just someone's suggestion.

[ksv]

We're terrorists, aren't we, Giaguara?

Okay, seriously though, the board rules may need some refinement, and it has been up for discussion.
Maybe ScottW & co will listen if you post some real suggestions