Let's see if I understand your asterisk scribble:
"I hate how Microsoft Office is so far off from Apple."
Am I close? (Count the letters, it's an exact match char-for-char.)
In response to above: The alternative on this computer to IE is Netscape 4.7, which I detest, to say the least. IE 5 (this under 9.2.2 on a G3/233 Mhz) is plenty fast, and it renders relatively quickly and accurately, and I hate the look of Netscape. (And don't tell me to upgrade to 7 because that's not my call.) IE works plenty well for me, I just want updated support for new standards and new technologies.