Your memory figures are not quite accurate. The 9600M (a discrete video controller) is either 256 or 512 MB depending on model, and the 9400M is integrated video, using 256MB (minimum) of the main system memory. The amount of main memory (or the amount of dedicated graphics memory), by itself, would not significantly make a difference in the speed of the video
The better performance will come with the 9600M, which has its own dedicated memory, and does not share with the main memory as the 9400M does.
Do you have two different MacBook Pros?
You mentioned the 8600M, which is not part of the current dual-video MacBook Pros.