Rhisiart
Registered
The inventive language created by doctors the world over to insult their patients - or each other - is in danger of becoming extinct. Dr Adam Fox, who works at St Mary's Hospital in London, says that far fewer doctors now annotate notes with acronyms designed to spell out the unsayable truth about their patients.
Top medical acronyms
Top medical sayings
The increasing rate of litigation means that there is a far higher chance that doctors will be asked in court to explain the exact meaning of NFN (Normal for Norfolk) or FLK (Funny looking kid).
Dr Fox recounts the tale of one doctor who had scribbled TTFO - an expletive expression roughly translated as "Told To Go Away" - on a patient's notes. Apparently he said: "This guy was asked by the judge what the acronym meant, and luckily for him he had the presence of mind to say: 'To take fluids orally'."
And much of the slang is directed at colleagues rather than patients. Thus rheumatology, considered by hard-pressed juniors one of the less busy specialties, becomes "rheumaholiday", the "Freud Squad" are psychiatrists, and "Gassers" and "Slashers" are anaesthetists and general surgeons respectively.
Dr Fox is keen to point out that neither he, nor the other authors of the paper, published in the journal Ethics and Behavior, actually advocate using any of the terms. He simply says: "It's a form of communication, and it needs to be recorded.
Top medical acronyms
- CTD - Circling the Drain (a patient expected to die soon)
- GLM - Good looking Mum
- GPO - Good for Parts Only
- TEETH - Tried Everything Else, Try Homeopathy
- UBI - Unexplained Beer Injury
- LOBNH - Lights On But Nobody Home
- CNS-QNS - Central Nervous System - Quantity Not Sufficient
Top medical sayings
- Digging for Worms - varicose vein surgery
- Departure Lounge - elderly ward
- Pumpkin Positive - refers to the implication that a penlight shone into the patient's mouth would encounter a brain so small that the whole head would light up
- Handbag Positive - confused patient (usually elderly lady) lying on hospital bed clutching handbag
- Tissuectomy - constantly having to remove a tissue or handkerchief from the elderly lady's other hand
- Dirt Bag Index - multiply the number of tattoos with the number of missing teeth to give an estimate of the number of days since the patient last bathed
The increasing rate of litigation means that there is a far higher chance that doctors will be asked in court to explain the exact meaning of NFN (Normal for Norfolk) or FLK (Funny looking kid).
Dr Fox recounts the tale of one doctor who had scribbled TTFO - an expletive expression roughly translated as "Told To Go Away" - on a patient's notes. Apparently he said: "This guy was asked by the judge what the acronym meant, and luckily for him he had the presence of mind to say: 'To take fluids orally'."
And much of the slang is directed at colleagues rather than patients. Thus rheumatology, considered by hard-pressed juniors one of the less busy specialties, becomes "rheumaholiday", the "Freud Squad" are psychiatrists, and "Gassers" and "Slashers" are anaesthetists and general surgeons respectively.
Dr Fox is keen to point out that neither he, nor the other authors of the paper, published in the journal Ethics and Behavior, actually advocate using any of the terms. He simply says: "It's a form of communication, and it needs to be recorded.
