The Mac Jargon Dictionary

iSight: One of five senses.
iChat: When your eyes send messages to each other saying how beautiful your Mac is.
SimpleText: Passages that can be understood by all.
Print Center: Where you take your documents for printing when your Windows box crashes again.
Applet: A baby Apple computer, ie. the G4 cube or such.
Crash: Windows 95/98/NT/2000/Me/XP/Longhorn. There is no end in sight.
Reliable OS: Impossible feat for Microsoft.
Dreamweavers: The staff at Apple Computer: could your computer run any nicer?
Windows XP: An allusion to its real name, Windows Crap-E.
 
I like "Applet" :)

Beta: The Mac is Beta, and that's all there is to it. :p

iChat AV: Essential software for any long-distance cybersexual relationship.

Upgrade: A steep hill. So called because driving on an upgrade is much like using a computer that needs one. :confused:

Prototype: Apples that haven't ripened yet.
 
Airport Express: The bus that gets you from the airport to your hotel and only costs as much as an international plane ticket or 20 minutes in an airport carpark.

XCode: The colloquial name for the code used by US generals to get into the restricted areas where they keep alien space-craft, mind-control machines, and Elvis.

Safari RSS: Enables hunters to catch up on their news while tracking rhinos.

Spotlight: A new search technology in MacOS 10.4 that will let users find items by searching metadata such as "Shiny" "Pinkish" "Cheesy" and "Sticky"

Core Image: A naughty picture of a computer without its case on.

Core Video: Same as core image, but more animated.
 
2. Kernel Panic: (Verb) what popcorn dose in a microwave before it pops.

1. Dock: where applications stay port till ready to go out to sea

2. Dock: dock for iPod see dock 1
 
Time for another update, I guess.

AirTunes: 1. Music played by blowing over the opening of a bottle. 2. A magical way of sending sound wirelessly through the air, so that it can be recieved by a stereo. Apple were the first to invent this. That whole Marconi thing was done with smoke and mirrors.

CoreVideo: An adult movie retailer in the back streets of Cupertino, California.

Delicious Library: An unsuccessful venture by the same witch who built the gingerbread house in the forest. It was eaten by a mob of villagers carrying pitch-forks and really big plates.

Suck Effect: 1. A state of having windows "Suck" into the dock. 2. A state of having Windows installed on your computer.

Playlist: The clipboard that a bouncer at a really exclusive children's cubby house consults before he decides whether to let kids in or not.

Party Shuffle: See also: Dancing while excessively drunk.
 
Here it is again ...

Mac Mini: A small trenchcoat worn by midgets.

iWork: What optometrists do.

Jam Pack: An unsuccessful packaging experiment for jam, involving squeeze sachets that were meant to put the jam onto the bread easily, but as it turned out, they also easily put the jam onto the ceiling, the mother in law, the dog and the next door neighbour.

OSX: Dysliexic Grafitti

BYODKM: Bring Your Own Display, Keyboard and Megaphone.

OK, so who has a good one for iPod shuffle, Asteroid, Pages, ThinkSecret, iMovie HD, Soundtrack ... ??
 
Pages: Your parakeet's lavatory.

Soundtrack: The violins you hear when your parakeet dies.

Is this good? I'm new to this. :)
 
Mini iPod shuffle mini mini: So small you can barely even see it. Holds one song and fits inside your ear and is practically impossible to get out again. Has only one button "Go" which starts it playing. Retails for 99 cents. Mac fanatics often load it up with a Spice Girls song and slap it into the ear of someone they really hate.
 
How do you hit the button when it's lodged in the ear? Start it beforehand? ::ha::
 
Halo effect: Illusion that one radiates beams of light when decked out in a gleaming new iPod and smiling beatifically.
 
ThinkSecret: The misterious hush-hush surrounding the creative stage at which Apple DNA and Steve Jobs' Ego rip, mix and burn in the hidden bowels of 1 Inifinite Loop, to be kept there shrouded in mysteries until the world is fit for the revelation.
 
ThinkSecret: The reason the Apple design team have taken to hiding in attics and car boots and not going out into the sunlight.
 
Front Row: The best seats in an auditorium or theatre, unless the show involves magicians, animals, hypnosis, clowns or fireworks.

iSight: What your optometrist checks when you are getting some iWork done.

Tiger: The component inside your Mac that handles all the tiging.

Shake: A video compositing technique that involves sticking bits of video footage together by using a gooey substance available from McDonalds.

Aperture: A photographic term for a small opening, such as the small opening in the high-end photographic software market that Apple has chosen to move into with this software.

Universal Binaries: The green shimmery stuff that Neo fights with in The Matrix.

Rosetta: A stone tablet discovered at an archaelogical dig which gives full operating instructions to the Stonehenge(tm) processor set.
 
symphonix said:
Mini iPod shuffle mini mini: So small you can barely even see it. Holds one song and fits inside your ear and is practically impossible to get out again. Has only one button "Go" which starts it playing. Retails for 99 cents. Mac fanatics often load it up with a Spice Girls song and slap it into the ear of someone they really hate.


how do you shuffle one song ? :rolleyes: :p
 
iCal a word made up on the day the new calandar app was finished. couldn't think of any ambiguous single words, and icalender had too many sylables. iCal was born. often confused with being a calculator.
 
MacBook Pro: A professional writer of technical books, which usually weigh more than the computer itself and start with something like "Ruby-on-Rails makes coding for web applications so unbelievably simple even a child of four could do it, and this 1500 page book will get you started!". If you believe the introduction, you will have your confidence crushed before you even reach chapter 8 "Abstract subnominal variables in a multi nomenclature environment".

Dual-Head: A mutation caused by spending too long in front of a computer monitor.

iWeb: Software for Spider-Man.
 
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