Originally posted by voice-
Gather 'round kids!
Once upon a time there was a little birdie who was always singing cause he was so happy. Then the evil red-headed birdie came by and got the little singing birdie drunk. They married the same night, and the singing birdie was sad. He was trapped in a marrige where he was to be tortured by shopping with his wife birdie and on top of that, she used his credit-birdie-card.
Then, one day, a the little birdie saw a blonde birdie outside his prison window. He started talking to her in secret and soon they became friends. Then, one day, without the singing birdie ever knowing, the blonde birdie dove from a tree and drove her beak through the evil red-headed birdie's head.
The little singing birdie was grateful and they lived happily ever after.
Oh, so cute
An aussie, a south african and an englishman sat in a bar in London, drank beer and told each other stories. Suddenly, the aussie downs his beer, throws the glass in the air, draws his revolver and shoots the glass into pieces.
"In 'straaalia, we have soo many glaaasses, that we neva'r need to drink from the saim wons twaice".
Obviously surprised, the south african downs his beer, throws his glass in the air, draws his revolver and shoots the glass into pieces.
"In Sath Efrika, the gl'sses ar so cheep, that we nev'r need to dr'nk from the same ones twice".
The englishman downs his beer in fine, english style, throws the glass in the air, draws his revolver, and shoots both the aussie and the south african.
"In London, we have so many aussies and south africans, that we never need to drink with the same ones twice".