hey hey, the place has been busy hasn't it?
so RacerX it sounds like you are happier now than you would have been if you had moved to southern bumfuck and been chained to windows.(as oppossed to northern bumfuck where you are now
) (subliminal message - *f&i(s%h#t+a@c!o?) of course i know you've talked about still doing alot of work on windows and how steady that aspect of your biz is. I am sure that the other guys can really appreciate all that gear you had before much better than me. I am more impressed that you were able to put together what you wanted and make it work to your advantage. that is so different from what most people experience.
so do you think you will ever head back out to CA or is business too good to leave there? I can't imagine there are a whole lot of people with your overall knowledge back there so i would think you might have added value in that area.
and say hello to the wife for me
klink - 'Bummer man'. i can see why you are wound tight. being put in a position like that is nasty. I guess i would hope that your mate lands on his feet soon and that you can stay in touch. i know that's not like having a pal around at work, but it would certainly help ease the pressure you are putting on yourself - the survivor's guilt. Keep in mind that survivors guilt has been a kind of national malady recently. I am sure you saw some in the city. you probably even experienced it on some level or another. so having to deal with it again so soon, only adds the pain from before to the present.
the conflicting emotions is also hard to deal with. we tend to experience them in surges and feel kind of numb in between. and the numb is the worse part.
I wouldn't want to minimize the rest of the shit that is going on, but it sounds like it is SNAFU for you. i would imagine you would be dealing with it with a lot more grace if your pal was still working by your side.
I must also add that your story reminds me of one of my old clients who had his first bipolar break when a similar thing happened at his workplace. I'm not trying to imply that you are about to go off the deep end or anything. just stressing how stressful the situation can be and how unaware people like bosses can be as to how some of their actions will effect/affect people. I guess the best hint i could give you actually relates to RacerX's post. remember that you have choices and be aware to know that you can use them if you need to. thinking ahead about the situation will go farther than dwelling on the past and your investment of yourself so far. You are still human, and can only do so much. I don't care if you are a NY'r.
venting can be a very good thing if you listen to yourself in the process. hopefully you learned more from yourself by sharing this with us. and rereading it a time or 2 wouldn't hurt either i bet.
Thanks for showing up tonite guys.