What is your favourite quotes?
- Thread starter Rhisiart
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Rhisiart
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What is the book?
ElDiabloConCaca
U.S.D.A. Prime
It's better to be pissed off than pissed on.
Unknown
Unknown
Too many to pick just a few.. but I try to keep a track of the ones that I like most..
Never express yourself more clearly than you think.
~ Neils Bohr
I complained that I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet.
~ Persian proverb
Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.
~ Leonardo da Vinci
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do.
~ Samuel Clemens
Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius, and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction.
~ Albert Einstein
Never express yourself more clearly than you think.
~ Neils Bohr
I complained that I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet.
~ Persian proverb
Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.
~ Leonardo da Vinci
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do.
~ Samuel Clemens
Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius, and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction.
~ Albert Einstein
Rhisiart
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I'm impressed. Its a great feeling to see something you have done in print.
Excellent.
1. I think it would be a good idea!
In reply to a reporter who asked "What do you think of Western Civilization?"
-Gandhi
2. I was scared the first time I had sex. I was all alone.
-Rodney Dangerfield
3. Times are tough. The hookers are giving out toasters.
-Rodney Dangerfield
In reply to a reporter who asked "What do you think of Western Civilization?"
-Gandhi
2. I was scared the first time I had sex. I was all alone.
-Rodney Dangerfield
3. Times are tough. The hookers are giving out toasters.
-Rodney Dangerfield
bbloke
Registered
"The difference between an optimist and a pessimist is that the pessimist is usually better informed."
- Claire Booth Luce
"They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety."
- Benjamin Franklin
"It is better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt."
- misattributed to Mark Twain
Or: "Listen widely to remove your doubts and be careful when speaking about the rest and your mistakes will be few."
- Confucius
"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars."
- Oscar Wilde
- Claire Booth Luce
"They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety."
- Benjamin Franklin
"It is better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt."
- misattributed to Mark Twain
Or: "Listen widely to remove your doubts and be careful when speaking about the rest and your mistakes will be few."
- Confucius
"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars."
- Oscar Wilde
"Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety." — (attributed to Benjamin Franklin)
"It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt." — Mark Twain
"I worked myself up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty." — Groucho Marx
"If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man." — Mark Twain
"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read." — Groucho Marx
"Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough." — Groucho Marx
"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." — Groucho Marx
"Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy." — Groucho Marx
"The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open." — Groucho Marx
"While hunting in Africa, I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How an elephant got into my pajamas I'll never know." — Groucho Marx
"Love goes out the door when money comes innuendo." — Groucho Marx
"I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception." — Groucho Marx
"I have nothing but confidence in you. And very little of that." — Groucho Marx
"Here's to our girlfriends and wives; may they never meet!" — Groucho Marx
"It could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no distinctly American criminal class except Congress." — Mark Twain
"Most people are bothered by those passages of Scripture they do not understand, but the passages that bother me are those I do understand." — Mark Twain
"Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself." — Mark Twain
"All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure." — Mark Twain
"The report of my death was an exaggeration." — Mark Twain, New York Journal, June 2, 1897
"It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt." — Mark Twain
"I worked myself up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty." — Groucho Marx
"If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man." — Mark Twain
"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read." — Groucho Marx
"Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough." — Groucho Marx
"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." — Groucho Marx
"Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy." — Groucho Marx
"The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open." — Groucho Marx
"While hunting in Africa, I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How an elephant got into my pajamas I'll never know." — Groucho Marx
"Love goes out the door when money comes innuendo." — Groucho Marx
"I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception." — Groucho Marx
"I have nothing but confidence in you. And very little of that." — Groucho Marx
"Here's to our girlfriends and wives; may they never meet!" — Groucho Marx
"It could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no distinctly American criminal class except Congress." — Mark Twain
"Most people are bothered by those passages of Scripture they do not understand, but the passages that bother me are those I do understand." — Mark Twain
"Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself." — Mark Twain
"All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure." — Mark Twain
"The report of my death was an exaggeration." — Mark Twain, New York Journal, June 2, 1897
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Rhisiart
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MDINKY: I think some of these quotes are attributed to Oscar Wilde, not Mark Twain. Maybe I am wrong.
"The report of my death was an exaggeration."
"It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt."
Unless our Oscar was plagiarist.
"The report of my death was an exaggeration."
"It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt."
Unless our Oscar was plagiarist.
Doctor X
Registered
Quotes are often misattributed. The first is generally attributed to Mark Twain or another guy, Samuel Clemens. I have not seen it attributed to Wilde. It is from a letter to the New York Sun and the original phrase was: ". . . this report of my death was an exaggeration."
The Dorothy Parker quote regarding the Yale Prom is often printed differently, but it comes from a person who heard her say it. We often alter and improve on quotes.
For another example, FDR's VP for his first two terms expected FDR to only last one term, and he would become President. His comment on the Vice Presidency is often reported as "not worth a warm bucket of spit."
It was actually "a warm bucket of piss." It was censored in the news.
And, again, Churchill never said that there were only three "grand traditions of the Royal Navy: rum, sodomy, and the lash!"--it was an aide--but remarked he wished he had.
One of the weirdest misattributions I have seen on Al Gore's Interwebs was some clown who attributed the infamous Cromwell quote--incorrectly phrased--to . . . Einstein! Did not know Einstein was a Puritan! He stormed off after that correction!
I had the occasion to correct a quote attributed to Yogi Berra--he did not actually say it. But as his books notes, "I never said half the things I said!"
Though, my favorite quote from Yogi--as a Glorious Red Sox fan:
--J.D.
The Dorothy Parker quote regarding the Yale Prom is often printed differently, but it comes from a person who heard her say it. We often alter and improve on quotes.
For another example, FDR's VP for his first two terms expected FDR to only last one term, and he would become President. His comment on the Vice Presidency is often reported as "not worth a warm bucket of spit."
It was actually "a warm bucket of piss." It was censored in the news.
And, again, Churchill never said that there were only three "grand traditions of the Royal Navy: rum, sodomy, and the lash!"--it was an aide--but remarked he wished he had.
One of the weirdest misattributions I have seen on Al Gore's Interwebs was some clown who attributed the infamous Cromwell quote--incorrectly phrased--to . . . Einstein! Did not know Einstein was a Puritan! He stormed off after that correction!
I had the occasion to correct a quote attributed to Yogi Berra--he did not actually say it. But as his books notes, "I never said half the things I said!"
Though, my favorite quote from Yogi--as a Glorious Red Sox fan:
--J.D.
bbloke
Registered
Looks like people like the "better to keep your mouth shut/closed" quote, as it has been cited three times now. 
There seem to be a couple of variations:
I agree, quotes are often misattributed. Unfortunately some rather good ones are too!
BTW, "Samuel Clemens" was the real name of Mark Twain, in case there was any confusion.
There seem to be a couple of variations:Wikiquote said:
I agree, quotes are often misattributed. Unfortunately some rather good ones are too!
BTW, "Samuel Clemens" was the real name of Mark Twain, in case there was any confusion.
Doctor X
Registered
Yeeeeessssssssss . . .
Reminds me of a story: whilst listening to the radio, yet another abomination from Sir Paul "That Doggone Girl is Mine!" McCartney came on. I turned to a colleague and quipped:
"Was Paul McCartney in a band before "Wings?"
Colleague responded, "a little one." We laughed. About ten minutes later, a teen-volunteer responded:
"I think he was in The Beatles?"
--J.D.